Show business is a dog eat dog world. Make sure your dog isn't
anorexic.
Posted: 12/17/2000
When he was describing the people who ride the number seven
train, I thought he was personally talking about members of my family.
Posted: 12/17/2000
Lending a crackhead $20 bucks is like loaning out one of your
good knives to O.J. Simpsons -- you're never going to see it again.
Posted: 12/17/2000
If gang members have to kill, kill constructively -- kill some
Ku Klux Klan.
Posted: 12/17/2000
She had something like 'time out.' It was called 'knock out.'
Posted: 12/17/2000
We do have something in common in that tonight neither one of
us will be having meat.
Posted: 12/17/2000
Last weekend, I went to my family reunion. And you people know,
family reunions is that time when you come face to face with your family tree, and...
Posted: 12/20/1999
Now that's an extreme religion: Amish. Oh my God, it's against
their religion -- it's a sin for them -- to ride in a car. Then I heard an Amish guy...
Posted: 12/20/1999
All he has to do is take that machine, hook it up to the
Clapper, and let those people clap themselves to death. They clap on, but they don't clap...
Posted: 05/18/1993
My nephew wanted me to get him some of those pump up basketball
shoes, costs $150. I'm sorry, people, but I'm not gonna pay $150 for shoes that I...
Posted: 05/18/1993