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Pete is an obnoxious father.
Texting a picture of your balls to isn't very fatherly.
Pete loves messing with people.
Kids will find your most insecure physical quality and draw the hell out of it.
Kids can be selfish.
People in L.A. are liberal, but only about certain things.
Karen Rontowski wants to please her date.
Parents shouldn't allow their kids to wear whatever they want.
Married men don't get guts from drinking beer; they get guts from swallowing pride.
Women don't like when you just lay on their couch all day.
It's best to shush your partner when they're talking about something important in front of people.
Paralyzed Pets: all of the lovin' and none of the runnin'.