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I'm not getting smarter about women.
When you say "no," alcohol says, "you sure?"
First you're happy, then you're sad, then you're driving.
It's the perfect drink -- if you're batman.
When you get older, your perspective changes.
It's not the woman's responsibility to have big breasts.
Men need to look tough and think they can get any woman.
How does the 28-year-old virgin do it?
I love when they call actors bad boys.
When you're 40, you're not single. You're alone.
Men are quite simple.
Kathy wants to slip a sailor a roofie.
Guys think that if they can get a woman to touch their penis, they will get sex.
Men, you can do what you want, just don't hurt her or wake her up.
Marc Maron considered leaving his wife at the altar.
It's good that guys are always in the mood for sex.
Men live for the hunt; sex is only the end result.
Turn the light on, something just touched my ass.