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Hi, Matt! You're here for the role of unattractive man.
My relatives don't think comedians exist.
The Humane Society called Matt's friend a dick.
Kevin is thinking about doing topless modeling.
Chain restaurants are a butt-fluff of suggestive selling and happy-happy birthday songs.
Penguins are really dumb.
Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger likes to use lines from his movies in political speeches.
Jewish people are both obsessed and repulsed by Hitler.
You don't have to be a gangster to listen to gangsta rap. You don't have to be your entertainment.
Comedians don't get the city to themselves during the day anymore.
Hotels make you feel really bad about ordering porn.