She just wrote her autobiography, my mother. You have to pick
it up. It's in the stores now. It's entitled, 'I Came, I Saw, I Criticized.'
Posted: 02/24/1992
You know what the good thing about Alzheimer's disease is? You
meet new people every day.
Posted: 02/24/1992
I always wanted my family to be like 'The Brady Bunch.' Do you
remember what the father did on the show? Architect. He was brilliant. Six kids, two...
Posted: 02/24/1992
We used an anonymous sperm donor, which I know is very
fascinating to a lot of people. So people are always trying to get information out of me by...
Posted: 12/08/2002
I played clarinet in the marching band and I was fat, which was
horrible because we used to sell these candy bars for the band so we could go on...
Posted: 05/30/1994
Every item in women's clothing stores now has shoulder pads in
them, right? Because women are actually supposed to look more masculine, more broad,...
Posted: 05/30/1994
We got them an answering machine, which is like the stupidest
gift to give your parents because no one ever calls my parents except for their kids....
Posted: 05/30/1994
My therapist is so weird. I go in last week; she brings her
daughter in to listen to my session. I'm like, 'What's this with the kid?' 'It's career...
Posted: 05/30/1994
I performed at a Democratic fundraiser in Miami Beach about two
and a half years ago, and I performed for Bill Clinton. I did stand-up comedy for...
Posted: 09/14/2000
I actually had anxiety for so long I went to a psychiatrist.
And I said to the guy, 'I'm constantly anxious. What do I do?' He told me I had...
Posted: 09/14/2000