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You can get a free meal at Denny's on your birthday.
If you want to meet stupid people, lock your keys in your car.
John hates kids.
Having Monday off doesn't make a difference to Fred.
Some people outgrow drinking games in junior high school.
Grandmothers make furniture look better with doilies.
Denny's: a place to eat for the tired or wasted.
Richard Lewis can smell good food anywhere.
Growing up, Richard had depression fairs instead of birthday parties.
You can spackle windows with tofu.
Richard Lewis' grandparents lived for food.