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The further away John gets from the recall button, the bigger the trouble he's in.
Nothing benefits you by telling the truth ever.
Condoms and Tums
Standup keeps John from picking up shovels.
The "we gotta go" girl
Guy who bought a bus on eBay: you're John's new hero!
Women are not like video games.
John loves his wife but misses his roommate, Rob.
Never just hit on one girl.
CCP: John Heffron
John advises young guys to go after older women.
Clutterblindness affects 110% of all men.
Ladies, if you want the dishes done, call your guy a dick.
For guys, even the need for insulin won't interfere with a friend's hook up.
John makes his wife a card, complete with stripper dust.
Men can't say "tsk."
John wants to outlaw girl glitter.
Girls don't leave their own behind.