I was at my first Hollywood party, trying to fit in, trying not
to sweat. And this woman who I just met comes up to me and says, 'Hey, Jackie,...
Posted: 02/27/2003
I moved from Minnesota to Los Angeles, and it was very scary to
move to Los Angeles 'cause I thought that everyone would be mean. I thought there...
Posted: 02/27/2003
Somebody stole the tape deck out of my hunk of junk car.
Somebody broke the passenger side window and stole the tape deck out of my vehicle. Here's...
Posted: 02/27/2003
I have a theory that Osama bin Laden is hiding in North Platte,
Nebraska, and that we should bomb it just in case. If I am wrong, what have we lost?
Posted: 02/27/2003
I love my parents. They are very, very funny people. I come by
this very honestly. They're not nice people; they're funny. They make up for it with...
Posted: 02/27/2003
I went to all the houses in the neighborhood, Dad, except for
the houses that said, "No soliciting" 'cause the coach said you're not supposed to go...
Posted: 02/27/2003
My father sells aluminum siding, and the triumph of my father's
aluminum siding career is that there is a brick house in South Milwaukee,...
Posted: 02/27/2003
He's got all kinds of advice about show biz. He says, 'It's
just like sales. You gotta make your opportunities. You gotta take your opportunities....
Posted: 02/27/2003
There's a guy I went to college with who legally changed his
name to his Dungeons & Dragons' dude master name... He went down to the county...
Posted: 02/27/2003
It's true that there are plenty of video games tiny children
should not play. I am a grown up lady, and I need to shoot sh*t.
Posted: 02/27/2003