I love my family but my family -- they're the type of people
that never let you forget anything you ever did when you were little. I was in the...
Posted: 10/30/2008
I was brought up Catholic. My mom brought us to mass every
Sunday -- short for 'massive head trauma' that you get from your mother punching you in...
Posted: 10/30/2008
Faith is a huge concept for anyone to grasp, never mind a
child. You have to be careful you don't send mixed signals. I mean, when I found out...
Posted: 10/30/2008
Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper,
had recently died.
"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad. Skipper's probably...
Posted: 12/01/2008
We were kids living in Hong Kong. How cool is that? Think about
that for a second -- everything you were playing with was made here, right...
Posted: 10/30/2008
Up north, when people tell you stuff, you know what it means,
am I right? I remember when I was a kid, this guy goes, 'Eh, get off my lawn, or I'll...
Posted: 10/30/2008
It's low self-esteem. I understand; I was brought up with it. I
go on the road -- when I do concerts, I bring a portable Wailing Wall. I'm always...
Posted: 10/30/2008
When I was little, my dad used to tell me, for my birthday,
he's gonna take me out and show me a good time. Couldn't sleep all night -- he's gonna...
Posted: 11/02/2008
I went to Catholic school, everyone in my neighborhood was
Catholic -- I literally had no idea that Jews existed. I thought they were characters in...
Posted: 10/30/2008
I've always felt sorry for Jesus 'cause you know no matter what
he ever did, he could never live up to his father.
Posted: 10/30/2008