Their holy holiday is Ramadan. It's a month-long holiday where
you can't drink, can't eat, can't smoke, can't have sex until sundown for 28 days....
Posted: 07/31/2003
These are sexually frustrated people. You want to liberate
these people? We shouldn't be dropping bombs on these people -- we should be dropping...
Posted: 07/31/2003
The number two cause of death among teenagers in America today
are guns. You know the number one cause of death? Not having a gun.
Posted: 07/31/2003
It is the little things in life that are important: a good
meal, fresh-fallen snow, the look on a child's face just before you hit him....
Posted: 07/31/2003
How do you catch criminals without guns? 'All right, we've got
the place surrounded. Red rover, red rover, send the bad guy over.'
Posted: 07/31/2003
Cell phones can give you brain tumors, and yet the anthrax only
killed five people. Maybe the terrorists should have just called us on our cell...
Posted: 07/31/2003
I think anytime you use a roaming charge, a little icon should
pop up with a guy getting f**ked in the ass. That way you know you're roaming.
Posted: 07/31/2003
I get 200 anytime minutes and 3,000
we're-gonna-pluck-you-like-a-pigeon-and-laugh-at-you minutes. It's great. I can call anyone on Mondays between...
Posted: 07/31/2003
I quit smoking 'cause I want to live, and now that I'm not
smoking, I don't want to live anymore.
Posted: 07/31/2003
We're not athletic people. That's why it took us so long to get
through that desert in the first place. Forty years -- we're not speed demons. We...
Posted: 07/31/2003