Greg Behrendt: Videos, Jokes, Tour Dates, Biography and more | Jokes.com

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"Greg Behrendt: That Guy From That Thing" premieres Friday, November 6 at 12am/11c.

Greg Paul Behrendt was made in a small textile factory north of San Francisco in the early sixties. He spent the lions share of his early youth as a sweat-jac (or sweater jacket) but as he got older, he realized his dream of going to college and becoming a pair of pants. After college, Greg became a person and started a wildly unsuccessful band all while holding down a job in an improv group. The days were long and the night's even longer, but success seemed to be almost right around the corner. Well, not success, but definitely a bar with lots of juicy liquor.

Watch a preview clip from Greg Behrendt: That Guy From That Thing.

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Matt BraungerIt's okay to drink straight vodka alone, but not if "No One is to Blame" by Howard Jones is playing. #suicidesaturday11:01 PM Today

Whitney CummingsI'll be performing in Kansas City! RT @chelseahandler: Comedians of Chelsea Lately LIVE in Kansas City http://lnk.ms/4X2Q310:36 PM Today

Russell PetersEnough with the Vampire shit already! We need a Brownpire!10:24 PM Today

robert kellyRTStuFromOtown @robertkellyfans Is that Black Devil Doll From Hell(1984) or Black Devil Doll(2007)? 2007 but 1984 is fucked 2 i have both10:19 PM Today

Christian FinneganMore nervewracking than telling jokes on camera? Watching someone else tell your jokes on camera. A dizzying mix of pride and horror.9:46 PM Today

Michael ShowalterBig difference between telling someone to "Go forth!" and telling someone to "Go fourth!" They might misunderstand and go first.9:42 PM Today

Michael Showalterchicken flavor nooders!!!!!!9:37 PM Today

Doug BensonOh my God, this sushi I'm eating tastes like raw fish.9:18 PM Today

Paul F. TompkinsFACEBOOK GROUPERS! Hopefully, this just got a lot simpler: http://bit.ly/61FLrl Add it to your page! #tompkins3009:14 PM Today

Matt BraungerHey, remember when all I tweeted about was my album? Well, that same album is now available at Vacation Vinyl in Los Feliz. #soweak9:00 PM Today

Greg Behrendt - Football Language

Coaches say weird things like, "Are you gonna swallow the olive?"

Tags: Greg Behrendt (28), food (804), Premium Blend (750)

Posted: 12/26/97
Views: 39,542

Greg Behrendt - Adult Rock Show

No time for opening acts

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Greg Behrendt - Just Not That Into You

Greg Behrendt makes a mix tape for a girl to get her to love him back.

Tags: Greg Behrendt (28), men/women (1003), dating (656)

Posted: 07/27/06
Views: 14,278

Greg Behrendt - Mix Tapes

The art of the mix tape.

Tags:

Posted: 07/28/06
Views: 9,061

Greg Behrendt - Talk About Sex

Do you know what's not helpful during sex? An audible disappointed breathing sound.

Tags: Greg Behrendt (28), sex (1283), men/women (1003)

Posted: 11/06/09
Views: 8,343

Greg Behrendt - Phone Sales

Hey man, it's Eddie!

Tags:

Posted: 01/15/01
Views: 8,307

Greg Behrendt - Airport Idiots

The airport idiot is the guy who dresses like the destination to which he's going.

Tags: Greg Behrendt (28), animals (791), music (727)

Posted: 11/06/09
Views: 6,722

Greg Behrendt - Oprah

Greg is scared of Oprah.

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Greg Behrendt - Computer Help

Greg is not a computer guy.

Tags:

Posted: 01/15/01
Views: 5,474

Greg Behrendt - Barely A Guy

Greg Behrendt is big and he likes women. After that, forget it.

Tags: Greg Behrendt (28), Comedy Central Presents (1821), men/women (1003)

Posted: 01/14/01
Views: 4,785

Greg Behrendt: A Peach

I was coming down the street today with my girlfriend. This guy shouts out, 'Hey man, your girlfriend's a peach!' And I thought, 'Well, that's...

Tags: lookin' good (489), dating (476), Greg Behrendt (17)

Posted: 05/26/1993

Greg Behrendt: Underground Band

So, I play in a band. It's a really underground band. Super underground. Very underground. Like, we don't even actually play.

Tags: pop culture (770), music (107), Greg Behrendt (17)

Posted: 05/26/1993

Greg Behrendt: The Dream Went Awry

If you sell things over the phone, the dream went awry somewhere, and you're working in a sweat box trying to make quota so you can buy some speed.

Tags: work/office (325), drugs (179), Greg Behrendt (17)

Posted: 01/14/2001

Greg Behrendt: Donnie Wahlberg of New Kids on the Block

He's the badass of the group -- like if they get into some kind of Scooby-Doo scrape, he's the one that's gonna get them out.

Tags: pop culture (770), Greg Behrendt (17)

Posted: 01/14/2001

Greg Behrendt: At the Hardware Store

For as much as I know about being a guy, I ought to go to a hardware store wearing a tiara. 'Hi, do you have a bang-bang-bang to put the pointy...

Tags: men/women (1718), shopping (135), Greg Behrendt (17)

Posted: 01/14/2001

Greg Behrendt: Car Mechanics

If you open up the hood and start talking about, 'That's got a dual-head-cammy,' you might as well say, 'Banana, banana, banana.' I don't know what...

Tags: men/women (1718), driving (241), Greg Behrendt (17)

Posted: 01/14/2001

Greg Behrendt: Not a Computer Person

At this point in time, that's like saying you're not 'into the phone.'

Tags: technology (345), Greg Behrendt (17)

Posted: 01/14/2001

Greg Behrendt: Jesus Is Ripped

Why wouldn't he be, he's the son of God? He's not gonna be walking around going, 'Oh, I've got back fat today. I'm so puffy.'

Tags: religion (507), lookin' good (489), Greg Behrendt (17)

Posted: 01/14/2001

Greg Behrendt: Sex Drive in Older Men

If my father is walking around going, 'Mmm, pussy,' he's thinking about eating the cat.

Tags: sex (2379), men/women (1718), animals (947)

Posted: 01/14/2001

Greg Behrendt: The Mix Tape

When you unleash the mix upon her, she will understand the beauty of who you are as a human being, and then she will melt and be in your bedroom...

Tags: dating (476), technology (345), music (107)

Posted: 07/27/2006