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Eddie Gossling

comedian Eddie Gossling was born in Johnson City, New York, while his father was away at pilot training in the Air Force. When Eddie was two years old his father fed him a teaspoon of horseradish sauce. Four hours later after a quick trip to the minor emergency room, Eddie was back in his crib, a stronger and wiser baby. In a way, Eddie's father did him a favor. When Eddie was four years old his grandmother gave him a bunny for Easter. Eddie accidentally poked one of the bunny's eyes out. Four hours later after a quick trip to the minor emergency room, the bunny received his freedom. In a way, Eddie did him a favor. When Eddie was nine years old, his mom, (against the recommendation of his teachers), suggested that he be held back a year in school. That same year he became head hall monitor with cafeteria captain looming in the near future. In a way, Eddie's mom did him a favor.

Happy childhoods lend themselves to happy adulthoods. After graduating from high school, as any normal nineteen year old would do, Eddie chose to follow in his father's footsteps, kind of, and enlisted in the Louisiana Army National Guard. After two years of service to the state of Louisiana, Eddie defected to the Texas National guard where he completed his military commitment and began to study art at Southwest Texas State University. Were it not for parking violations, Eddie would have received an associate's degree in artistic design. In a way, once again, the parking lot police did Eddie a... [MORE]
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Eddie Gossling Videos Eddie Gossling Jokes

Eddie Gossling - Math

NASA is one place you can't ballpark math.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Premium Blend (750), work/office (398)

Posted: 10/04/01
Views: 959

Eddie Gossling - Educating

If you're not getting good grades in Nebraska, try moving to Louisiana.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), books (748), parents (525)

Posted: 11/10/04
Views: 801

Eddie Gossling - Catholic vs. Episcopalian

An Episcopalian priest gets stingy with the blood of Christ.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Comedy Central Presents (1821), religion (776)

Posted: 02/19/04
Views: 736

Eddie Gossling - Quitting

If you get fired, especially from a bad job, you should go off.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Premium Blend (750), work/office (398)

Posted: 10/04/01
Views: 719

Eddie Gossling - Toilet Papering

Toilet papering never gets old.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Comedy Central Presents (1821), kids (841)

Posted: 02/19/04
Views: 0

Eddie Gossling - Alien Abduction

Eddie is not the guy you bring back to your planet.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Comedy Central Presents (1821), imitations (772)

Posted: 02/19/04
Views: 0

Eddie Gossling - Political Impressions

Eddie whips out some impressions.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Comedy Central Presents (1821), kids (841)

Posted: 02/19/04
Views: 463

Eddie Gossling - Teapot

Eddie blows his top.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Comedy Central Presents (1821), sex (1284)

Posted: 02/19/04
Views: 291

Eddie Gossling - Corrections

Eddie can tell that he's dreaming if he has a job.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Comedy Central Presents (1821), animals (793)

Posted: 02/19/04
Views: 272

Eddie Gossling - Racing

Eddie Gossling is Seabiscuit.

Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Comedy Central Presents (1821), money (866)

Posted: 02/19/04
Views: 255

Eddie Gossling: The Importance of Math

I suck at math. If you suck at math, you can't get a cool job later on in life. That's a big reason I'm a comic is because I suck at math. If it...

Posted: 10/04/2001

Eddie Gossling: Getting Fired

If I ever have to get another job, and I know I have to get fired that day, that day I'm going to go to work with a pocketful of glitter. And when...

Posted: 10/04/2001

Eddie Gossling: Nelly's Musical Powers

Nelly's pretty cool. He's got this one song where he talks about how hot it is and how this girl should just take her clothes off. But then the...

Posted: 02/19/2004

Eddie Gossling: Hobbies

One of my biggest hobbies? I like to rush to judgment.

Posted: 02/19/2004

Eddie Gossling: Stop Going to Work

You ever just stop going to a job? You don't even quit; you just stop showing up one day. I've done that a lot. I'm probably still on a couple of...

Posted: 02/19/2004

Eddie Gossling: Hating Magicians

I hate magicians, and you know why? They're never prepared, that's why. They always need something from the audience. I'm like, 'You knew you were...

Posted: 02/19/2004

Eddie Gossling: Israeli-Palestinian Conflict

My first impression of the current conflict between the Israelis and Palestinians: 'Mom, Israel's touching me!'

Posted: 02/19/2004

Eddie Gossling: Old Encyclopedias

I had a horrible set of encyclopedias growing up. My parents didn't want to get new ones, so they got my grandma's old ones. A-Z was covered in two...

Posted: 11/10/2004