Jokes
Death is gonna suck.
Filed under: Dana Gould (16), work/office (342), driving (263)
Views: 70
Posted: 12/21/1998
Dana Gould - Reasoning with Children
The minute that you think your kids have reason, they're the worst people in the world.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), kids (595), Live at Gotham (242)
Posted: 07/12/07
Views: 1,521
Dana Gould - The Afterlife
You'd feel like a moron if you got to Hell, and it was exactly what everyone says it is.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), imitations (766), food (493)
Posted: 12/21/98
Views: 1,347
Dana Gould - Break-Up
Dana went shopping after his girlfriend broke up with him.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), dating (611), The A-List (490)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 788
Dana Gould - Alien Abductions
It's always the same type of people who get abducted by aliens.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), ethnic (690), stereotypes (380)
Posted: 05/11/04
Views: 717
Dana Gould - Synchronized Lunatics
There might be another crazy guy 30 miles away responding to what that lunatic is saying.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), The A-List (490), alcohol (359)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 675
Dana Gould - Common Boxing
Boxing should open up its parameters.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), sports (226), pop culture (167)
Posted: 06/01/04
Views: 462
Dana Gould - Eating Out With the Family
If anyone spills anything, Dad will stick a fork right in your eyeball.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), kids (595), family (550)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 461
Dana Gould - Traveling
Every town in America has a porn shop.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), imitations (766), travel (234)
Posted: 12/21/98
Views: 322
Dana Gould - Girlfriend Moving Out
She'll leave you with just your toaster and a fork.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), men/women (839), dating (611)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 319
Dana Gould - L.A. Liberalism
People in L.A. are liberal, but only about certain things.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), kids (595), marriage (413)
Posted: 07/12/07
Views: 310
Reggie McFadden - Burn in Hell
Satan is the man you have to impress in hell.
Tags: Reggie McFadden (11), Reggie McFadden (11), money (445), work/office (342)
Posted: 08/29/97
Views: 1,317
Eddie Brill - You Go to Heaven
All our lives, heaven is pushed on us, but what if hell is the cooler place?
Tags: Eddie Brill (8), Comedy Central Presents (1779), religion (320)
Posted: 06/12/03
Views: 129
Janeane Garofalo - StairMaster Hell
Hell is being sentenced to the StairMaster.
Tags: Janeane Garofalo (4), food (493), The A-List (490)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 292
Paul Provenza - Holy Loophole
All Jesus does is bitch, moan and whine.
Tags: Paul Provenza (15), sex (904), religion (320)
Posted: 10/08/96
Views: 163
David Alan Grier - Compromise
Marriage is all about compromise.
Tags: David Alan Grier (39), men/women (839), marriage (413)
Posted: 07/31/99
Views: 169
David Alan Grier - Coach Captain
Willie is like a daddy to his players.
Tags: David Alan Grier (39), imitations (766), sports (226)
Posted: 07/31/99
Views: 116
Dave Attell - Men Who Don't Exist
Women always want opposites in men.
Tags: Dave Attell (24), men/women (839), dating (611)
Posted: 08/24/97
Views: 1,051
Dane Cook - That Guy
There's a guy at your work that nobody talks to.
Tags: Dane Cook (34), work/office (342), death (191)
Posted: 11/17/04
Views: 11,906
Tony Woods - Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
You never see a dead chicken on the side of the road.
Tags: Tony Woods (6), Comedy Central Presents (1779), imitations (766)
Posted: 08/19/01
Views: 1,127
LaVell Crawford - Fat Questions
People always ask LaVell dumb questions about his weight.
Tags: Premium Blend (749), driving (263)
Posted: 01/06/05
Views: 4,166
