Craig's twins are freaks.
Craig Anton was on the same flight as Eric Estrada.
Craig does not want to get married.
The total enrollment at Bob's Community College was two.
The other day I was flying in, I had Eric Estrada on my flight. And I had to say something -- I said, 'Hey, you're the guy from "Chips."' He said,...
I saw a license plate yesterday that said 'I Miss New York,' so I smashed their window and stole their radio.
I want to take one of those English as a Second Language courses -- just go in and blow everybody away on the first day.
What the hell is a 'time out'? When I was growing up, we had black outs.
I'm a different type of comic. I tend to start slow and then just kind of -- urinate on myself.